Never give up, take control of what you want

Growing up I was very shy, to the point I would be made fun of at school. I was decent looking guy in high school, my wife says I still look good. There are times I think she is wrong, there were times in high school I felt out of place. We had moved to Wyoming and it is a lot different the living in Utah. In Wyoming, everyone seems friendlier. I don’t remember being picked on in Wyoming at all. In Utah, I was picked on daily. When it came to writing I never really let anyone read what I wrote, unless it was a poem/story intended for someone.

Writing became an escape for me in middle school, that was where I received the brunt of my torment. My father didn’t know how bad it was, he only knew that I was missing school. He never asked why, so I never told him about the boy he called me names, tormented me until I would cry in class. The teenage years are the time when we, as humans are molded into the people who are later in life, that is my belief.

I began writing to take away the pain of going to school, I would write small stories about the bull, his name was Jared, amazing how I can remember that. Things never got better until I moved in with my mom and step-dad.

When I switched schools, there were people who teased, but not on the scale of Jared, and they did not make me feel the way he did. my 8th grade year I thought of taking things into my own hands. This was before Columbine, I never did do anything. Living with my mom and step-dad was calm most times. There were times that were not,  I would be wrestling with my brother(step-brother but I never call him that) and I would get carried away. I never let my mom know about how bad it was at the other school, she won’t know until she reads this, no one will.

When we moved to Wyoming my Junior year of high school, I was against it, until I was attacked with the new kid syndrome. Anyone that has been to a new school knows what this is like. I was hit on more times in the first few months than I ever was at any other school. I had never had that kind of attention, it was nice. I dated a few girls in high school, none of them too serious. I feel today that living in Wyoming and my parents moving there was the best thing they could have done for me.

Wyoming is a beautiful place, I miss it often. My senior year I took a creative writing class, after that I knew what I wanted to do, at the time I was planning on becoming a Marine, that never happened for one reason or another (long story).

Who I am today is because of the things I went through in my teenage years, mostly living in Wyoming. I once gave up on something because I was told I could not do it ( it was out of my control). This one thing, being a writer is in my control. I refuse to give up on it.


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