Losing that someone

When I came up with things for this post the only topic that came to me was this one. It coincides with my current WiP and it is a subject that I feel strongly about.


Everyone in life goes through horrible things, it is part of the learning process. It seems that depression is part of that process as well. I have had moments in life when I absolutely didn’t want to be on Earth anymore. I have stood with a bottle of pills next to me, razor in my hand and then walked away.

It was the walking away and the choosing to live with the life I have that changed me. I know it is not easy to walk away from the instrument of your choosing. We all we wish we could choose when we die. It is this choosing to die that contains the problems.

“All of us have a path to follow and the path begins on earth.” – Richard Matheson (What Dreams May Come)

When we are given such wonderful things to do and such miracles I will never understand why I nearly chose that path.

I think it was a clarity moment stopped it. A moment that I realized what I was doing and what it would do to my family.

The end of ones life should be when we are old and our bodies are like shar pei’s face. It shouldn’t be when our bodies are young and we have yet to really live.

I chose to really live, to enjoy everything. It hasn’t always been the best of times, but I have learned from my mistakes and learned who I can trust and what is most important to me.

In the last year it was something more that made me never want to make that choice. I read “What Dreams May Come” by Richard Matheson.

The movie really did not do the book justice. There were so many things left out that I felt like I was reading a different story.

In most cases, suicide is a solitary event and yet it has often far-reaching repercussions for many others. It is rather like throwing a stone into a pond; the ripples spread and spread.


I have had people leave my life because of this topic. Some I hardly knew others I knew but wish I’d known better, you can always know someone better.

This is much darker than I go in my Friday post. Usually I pick something that is supernatural but this one and all of this week’s posts have something to do with my current WiP.

Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.


The above quote is the most truthful thing ever said about this topic.


This entry was posted in family, Life, writing and tagged , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Losing that someone

  1. paulastewart55 says:

    I’m so happy to be reading this!!

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